How to do this: By being creative. Positive. And by reframing everything you’ve been involved in since graduating high school (even the tough stuff) as preparation for your big awesome future.
Some examples of making the best of your experience at a school you’re about to leave:
There was no formal Makeup Department, so guess what. I STARTED ONE. WE’VE GOT 16 MEMBERS. BOOM.
My classes were so much bigger than I thought they’d be AND there were no formal study groups set up, so guess what. I ORGANIZED ONE. AND I EVEN BAKED BROWNIES. #glutenfree
There were no legit dance studios on campus OR in the dorms open after 7pm, so guess what. I PETITIONED TO LIVE OFF-CAMPUS AS A FRESHMAN, FOUND A TINY APARTMENT WITH A BASEMENT THAT OUR TEAM COULD REHEARSE IN, AND WE GOT TO WORK. #werrrrk
You get the idea. How did you make the best of a just-okay situation while you were waiting (or before you decided) to fill out your transfer application? If you’re thinking that the part-time job you took, the decision to quit school, or even the Netflix shows you binge-watched wasn’t ultimately preparing you for your big awesome future, you’re just not thinking creatively enough—yet. Ask yourself: could it be that I was gaining other skills and values along the way? Could it be that I was doing more than just earning money (hint: learned organizational skills, or discipline, or collaboration), more than just quitting school (hint: learned to put your health first), more than just binge-watching Netflix (hint: learned how much you value productivity by being totally unproductive for three weeks straight).
Here’s a list to get you thinking.
And if you’re like, “Um, well, I didn’t do anything,” chances are that either a) you didn’t really think carefully or creatively enough yet, or that b) YOU DON’T DESERVE TO TRANSFER.
I’m kidding about that last one. Kinda’. Keep thinking. This part’s important.
Paragraph 5: What do you want to do/be/study? (aka: What’s your dream?)
What you’re trying to do here: Paint the Big Picture—the vision for your life, or a dream job. Don’t have one? Uh-oh. Quit now. (I’m kidding.)
How to do this: By dreaming. Ask yourself, What would a dream job be--even if it isn’t your only dream job, and even if you aren’t 100% certain that this is what you’d like to do--and use it as a placeholder, like these students did...
I’m particularly concerned about beauty waste because I am morally disturbed by the fact that my personal grooming is damaging the environment for everyone. The problem is that cosmetics are often objects of desire--we want to be pampered and we crave a luxurious experience--and packaging reflects these consumer instincts. My dream is to rally college communities nation-wide in a drive to reduce packaging waste. As a community of passionate learners and intellectuals we can spread the message to student groups in colleges that protecting the environment trumps our desire for the most wrapped-up, elaborate, expensive packaging.
My dream is to become a special effects makeup artist with a specialty in fantasy-based creature makeup. Through an extensive process that includes concept design, face, cowl, and body sculpting in clay, molding the pieces using liquid latex or silicon, applying the products to the human model, hand-painting and airbrushing, and fabricate addition components if necessary, I will create original characters that will be featured in movies and television shows.
I know, that’s pretty specific. But again, these were written by students who weren’t 100% certain that they wanted to do this--they picked something they loved and built an argument (read: essay) around it.
If it’s hard for you to think in terms of careers or dream jobs, try asking one of these questions instead:
“What’s one Big Problem I’d like to try and solve in the world?”
“Why do I want to go to this other school anyway?” Have you ever stopped to really articulate that? Have a friend ask you this and see what you say. And it can’t be simply because it’s more prestigious, or because you like living by the beach, or because you just really (like really) want to live in a big city. You need more specifics and more specific specifics. (That’s not a typo.)
A Really Good Tip for This Paragraph: Think of this as a set-up for a “Why us” essay, in particular the part where you’re talking about YOU… your hopes, dreams, goals, etc. Because if you can pick something specific--and even if it’s a placeholder (like the examples above)--this can lead directly into the next paragraph. How? Because, once you pick a Thing you’d like to do/study/be, then you can ask yourself, “Okay, what skills/resources/classes will I need in order to do/study/become that Thing?”
For more “Why us” resources:Click here for a three-part post on How to Write a “Why Us” Essay. Or click here for a Complete Guide to the “Why Us” Essay.
To recap: In Paragraph 5, you’re setting up the specifics that you’re seeking. Then...
When my son wanted to transfer from his small liberal arts college in the Pacific Northwest into a larger university to pursue chemical engineering, I offered to help him with his college application transfer essay.
I thought it would be a good opportunity to share my approach to writing the main Transfer Essay required by schools that use The Common Application.
My son, though with great reluctance, agreed to be my guinea pig.
I wanted to walk through the steps and chronicled the brainstorming/planning process:
We started by reviewing the prompt for the Common App transfer essayt: “Please provide a statement that addresses your reasons for transferring and the objectives you hope to achieve.” (250-650 words)
There are two main questions they want students to answer:
1. What are your reasons for transferring?
2. What objectives (goals) do you hope to achieve?
We agreed that the first part would take up most of the essay, about three-quarters.
Unlike the regular Common App prompt for incoming freshman, this prompt was less open-ended, and wasn’t looking for a classic “personal statement” essay.
It’s a direct question: Why do you want to change schools and attend a new school?
Not a: “Who are you?” question.
The transfer essay should try to answer the questions as directly as possible, and back up the main points with specific examples.
Still, I believe students should use this essay as an opportunity to reveal their personality and individuality as much as possible.
Students don’t need to use a narrative style, but I believe a story-telling format makes the best essays.
In a way, you are telling the “story” of your educational journey, and explaining a shift in your path.
You describe where you started and why, how it went so far (current school) and what you learned there, what changed and why, what you intend to study (your major) at your next school, and what what you hope to accomplish there and in the future with that degree.
Unlike most incoming freshman, transfer students need to have a clear idea of what they want to study.
Most are required to select a major at this juncture. That in itself gives these essays a strong focus.
I thought it would be a good idea to start the session with my son by fleshing out some of his core or defining qualities that he thinks would make him effective in his chosen major: chemical engineering.
Even if he didn’t include any of these ideas in his transfer essay, I believe it’s helpful for students to have a sense of who they are and articulate those before starting to write.
My son told me things, such as, “I find that I can get my head around complex ideas relatively quickly,” and “I like to see how things work, but also want to know more, how they can be used in other ways.”
I wrote down some of his statements, which he could refer back to later when he started writing.
(Find Your Voice shows why you could benefit by having another person question you to help you capture your unique language for your essay, the same way I did for my son.)
With the “why transfer” question, you need to talk about what inspired your interest in your field, and how that evolved and developed over the years, and what eventually led you to seeking a new school.
So I asked my son to think about some specific touch points in his life that sparked his interest in sciences, and specifically chemistry and engineering.
You don’t need to include all of these, but it helps to compile a short list.
If your essay traces this progression, it will have a natural order that makes it simple to write: chronologically!
My son remembered different experiments he did with various teachers over the years in both high school and college.
I also thought it was important to highlight the positive experiences he had at his current school, and then use those as a springboard to explain why he wanted more of those at his future school. Or maybe he wanted something different.
The last thing you want to do is diss your current school. Keep it upbeat. List about 3-5 features of your current school. Then list a similar number of features that the new school will have.
Coming up with the positive parts of his current school was easy.
The second part took a little more work: What objectives do you hope to achieve?
Because your one main Common App essay will go to all your schools, you need to keep the answer general enough so it works for all the schools.
So you should answer what objectives you hope to achieve at your next college or university, whichever it happens to be.
I would start by talking about the major you want to pursue there, and how you plan to join and support their academic and social community.
It is very difficult to avoid broad, generic answers here, but do your best to be specific about what you want to do there related to your major and goal, how you will participate in various activities and opportunities there, and how you envision using your degree after graduation and in the workplace.
To start my son’s main transfer essay, we fished around for an anecdote (mini-story or real-life example).
RELATED: My Video Tutorial on How to Write an Anecdote: Part One
The idea was to find an incident, moment or experience that would SHOW the reader a key quality about my son, which he would then go onto explain how that drove his path toward his major and new school.
His main theme turned out to be how he was the type of student who loved to learn new concepts, but was also eager to find “innovative” ways to use them.
This is just one way to approach this transfer essay. It might not work for everyone.
My son was unique in that he knew he would transfer when he started at his current school (where he did what is called a 3/2 program). But I think the approach of explaining the inspiration for your path–whether it’s art or business or biology-could work the same way.
Even if you are making a radical shift, just explain why and go from there.
As in all these essays, the admissions officers mainly want to hear how you think, what you value and that you have a plan.
Here’s What a Sample Outline Might Look Like for a College Application Transfer Essay
1. Introduction: An anecdote (mini-story/real-life example) showing what inspired your interest in your subject–what fired it up, or if it changed, what caused that shift.
2. Background: Take the reader back to some of your earlier experiences with your subject. Use specific examples.
3. Talk about your current school and what you got out of it. Give specific examples: focus on academics, but you could also mention other interests, social skills, etc.
4. Transition into the main reason you are ready to move on and into the new school. Maybe you liked certain things at your old school, but it had limitations and you wanted more. Maybe you changed, your interests changed, and the new school can serve those better than the first one. Back up your points with specific examples.
5. Objectives: Talk about what you want in your new school, or what you expect it will have to help you succeed. Focus your “objectives” around your intended major or field of study. Discuss what you hope to do both at the new school and after.
What do you want to learn? What do you see yourself doing with your degree? Possible jobs/specialty fields? Additional schooling/training? (You don’t have to know; just mention a couple possibilities.)
6. Conclusion. (This might just be combined with number 5.)
It never hurts to end with a sentence or two that projects your goals into the future.
What do you believe a degree in your major will allow you to do to follow your largest dreams–not just for yourself, but for the world?
More help for transfer students and their college application essays:
Don’t miss my Help for College Transfer Students that has links to resources, advice and inspiration for transfer students and their transfer essays!